When your income reaches six figures but your savings reach zero, something is off. At least that’s how one husband sees it—and now he’s ready to ditch the snacks, streaming, and maybe even the shorts.
“AITAH for giving my wife an ultimatum about her ‘work’?” In the Reddit post titled, a man says he’s tired and financially tapped out. He makes $100,000 in Salt Lake County, Utah, their mortgage is $2,200 a month, and the cars are paid off. But because of rising costs, he says, “we’re still running out of money.”
His wife, a former nurse, was a stay-at-home mom for more than six years. Two years ago, inspired by her sister’s success, she started a t-shirt business on Etsy. The result?
“To my knowledge, net $0 – unless she spends in ways I’m not aware of,” he wrote.
Don’t miss:
Meanwhile, spending hasn’t slowed. She says she’ll leave $300 on the kid’s birthday, then ask him later for grocery money. The pantry, he adds, “is filled with so many snacks that I never touch.” His mother often covers large-scale outings, which he believes is feeding an unrealistic sense of what their lifestyle should be.
“I love my kids,” he wrote, “but if we can’t pay for it, we shouldn’t do it. My wife can’t understand it.”
The real tipping point, she says, was that her business was wasting time and energy while producing nothing in return — “not being a housewife, she’s investing in this business that doesn’t bear fruit.” After 1.6 years of trying to remain cooperative, he gave her a two-year deadline: either bring in an income, or she would take full control of expenses.
Now that the deadline is here, he is ready to act.
“I won’t leave her. But I will cut Netflix, Amazon, etc. I will shop and I won’t buy the snacks she always gets. If I have to cook, I will.”
Commentators asked what his reaction was when he brought up his savings. He replied bluntly, “I bring it all up and he gets defensive, I just need to trust the process.”
Trend: Americans With Financial Planning Can 4x Their Wealth — Get your personalized plan from CFP Pro
That’s where patience ends.
Reddit users responded with a mix of finance-focused advice and candid assessments. One urged him to “pull your credit reports” because “his spending may be worse than you think.” Another suggested cutting off access to joint accounts and setting her a grocery budget “before she bankrupts you.”
But not everyone saw it that simply. Some said he might not have understood the math until he imagined it—offering suggestions like bills and income with Monopoly money to drive the point home. Others said her mother’s generosity may be distorting her sense of financial reality—she is using her mother’s money, not her husband’s.
Many even asked if she could return to nursing. He confirmed that his license is active and that their youngest is in school, making a part-time return possible. A fellow RN also said she makes “$600-$900 a week working school hours.”
Some pushed for tough love, warning that financial stress was one of the quickest routes to divorce. And yes, some say he’s right to take control. “He clearly has no sense of handling money, so you better take it,” wrote one.
See also: Got $100k+ to Invest? Charlie Munger says this is the hardest milestone ever – don’t stop now. Correspond with fiduciary counsel and continue construction
Still, in a marriage — especially one strained by money and resentment — “taking the reins” isn’t always as straightforward as Reddit makes it out to be.
The husband insists that he is not trying to dominate the relationship. “I don’t want to come off as a controlling husband,” he said. But the issue isn’t just dollars—it’s agency, trust, and who defines what “work” looks like.
Devil’s advocate? She is trying. Keeping her nursing license active for more than six years shows she hasn’t closed the door on returning to work. And while an Etsy business doesn’t generate any income, it can represent more than just t-shirts—it’s an effort to contribute without giving up independence, identity, or your role as a parent.
But at the end of the day, he’s staring at an empty bank account. He’s working full-time, plus a side gig, and he fears what will happen if even one paycheck stops. “If I lose my job, we’re going to be in big trouble,” he wrote.
Marriage counseling can help. So can a spreadsheet. But at some point, he says, words stop working. And if that two-year clock has just run out, he’s about to stop asking — and start budgeting.
Read next: 7 million players already trust Gameflip with their digital assets – Now you can own a stake in the platform
Image: Shutterstock
Next: Transform your business with Benzinga Edge’s one-of-a-kind marketplace business ideas and tools. Click now to access unique insights That can get you ahead in today’s competitive market.
Get the latest stock analysis from Benzinga:
This article Husband calls himself ‘bleeding money’ making $100K while ex-nurse wife spends for free and brings in $0—he’s issuing an ultimatum to his ‘job’ originally appeared on Benzinga.com.
© 2026 Benzinga.com. Benzinga does not provide investment advice. All rights reserved.
SAN FRANCISCO (AP) — Google's latest quarterly report provided further evidence that its Internet empire…
The decline in the pizza restaurant sector continues through 2026 with major dining chains closing…
By Chad Terhune and Julie SteenhusenSPARTANBURG, South Carolina/Chicago, Feb 4 (Reuters) - Measles vaccinations have…
A billionaire's famous philanthropist allegedly did not extend his extramarital affair.Bill Gates is facing intense…
A federal judge cast doubt on President Donald Trump's reasoning for trying to move his…
President Trump's plan for a more accommodative Fed could backfire so spectacularly that Jerome Powell…