Financial abuse is considered “the most widespread form of domestic abuse” – the National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV) states that it accounts for 99% of domestic violence cases (1).
It is defined as a situation where one partner uses money to control or manipulate the other partner. This can limit their access to money and financial information, how much money they have as a couple, restrict spending and prevent them from being financially independent.
to call someone The Ramsay Show November highlighted how financial abuse combines with other forms of abuse and can be used to make someone feel helpless (2).
Jackie, from Cincinnati, Ohio, told hosts George Kamel and Rachel Cruz that her husband was “verbally, emotionally and financially abusive.” She explained “Last night [that] He was subjected to physical abuse and arrested.”
While Jackie’s story is shocking, it also highlights the serious impact of financial abuse. As she told the hosts, “I’m in a situation where my husband is threatening to remove me from all accounts, credit cards, and leave me with nothing… He says I have to go into prostitution myself to get the money, which is so sick.”
Jackie says her husband, the sole breadwinner, is very knowledgeable about finances and is taking advantage of her ignorance. Their children are in college, and she wants the hosts to give her advice on how she can protect herself financially.
Jackie said The Ramsay Show She and her husband have a joint account and she is the authorized user on his credit card. He has a separate account in which he keeps the money he receives from his mother.
A surprised Cruz advised, “When you get off the phone with us, I’m going to the bank, and I’m going to open a new checking account. I’m going to take half of the money in that joint checking account and I’m going to put it in your own checking account where he has zero access.”
She advises Jackie to stay in a hotel until she gets support from friends and family.
“You deserve better, Jackie,” she said, making it clear that divorce was the only way she saw it. The Ramsey show generally recommends merging finances, but Cruz said when it comes to things like abuse and addiction, separate accounts are needed for protection.
“He knows he’s holding all the cards,” Kamel said. “I think when he finds out, oh he’s not coming back, oh he made his own account, oh he took half the money … I don’t think when the court demands that he pay alimony or child support, whatever it is … there are laws that protect you.”
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Since Jackie is only the authorized user of the credit card, she will not be responsible for any debt on that account. For joint accounts, “in most cases, state law or the terms of the account prevent someone from removing another person from a joint checking account without their consent. However, some banks may offer accounts where they allow this type of removal,” according to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB).
“Financial abuse is devastatingly effective because it is often not illegal, and it is an invisible tactic of domestic violence,” said Kim Pentico, director of the Economic Justice Program, National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV) (3). “Women literally have no money to pay for taxi fares, to buy food and other necessities of life, often forcing them to choose between homelessness and being beaten. This is a deeply powerless situation for these women.”
“Any woman can be a victim of financial abuse, regardless of economic or social status,” said John Rugel, senior vice president, life customer fulfillment and underwriting at Allstate.
It is important to note that as a joint account holder, you have equal rights and joint ownership of all funds in any bank account you own, regardless of who deposited the money. While the financially controlling spouse may try to block your access to accounts or account information, you have the right to know as much as you want about your family finances.
Because women are more vulnerable to abuse in relationships, some financial gurus like Kevin O’Leary advise them to sign a prenuptial agreement and keep their finances separate even after marriage. This can give women the financial freedom to leave an abusive relationship more easily – something Jackie’s situation shows very few women do.
If you feel your spouse is being financially abusive and may be using your information to open accounts in your name or access your accounts, you can call your bank and credit card companies to change your account numbers, PIN numbers, passwords, and any other access codes. It is very important to select passwords that your spouse or others cannot guess. Also make sure any computers or devices you use to access your banking information are secure and password protected. Some abusers install spyware on their partner’s devices, so make sure you’re free of any suspicious programs.
If you believe you are a victim of financial abuse or any other form of abuse, you can seek immediate help and support by contacting the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.SAFE (7233).
We rely only on vetted sources and reliable third-party reporting. For details, see our editorial ethics and guidelines.
National Network to End Domestic Violence (1); Ramsay Show Highlights/YouTube (2); The Allstate Foundation (3)
This article provides information only and should not be construed as advice. It is provided without warranty of any kind.
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