A hole in the marriage and a literal hole in the house. This is how a woman described the storm she was living through – financial, emotional and structural – after discovering her husband was secretly funneling her “fun money” to a woman behind bars.
The story was revealed during a recent episode of “The Ramsey Show,” where the co-hosts Rachel Cruz and George Kamel Took a call from a woman named Caroline. Four months ago, he checked his phone bill and saw some unfamiliar numbers. Her husband, who always claimed to be broke and anxiously waiting for his next cash allowance, was apparently in touch with a prison pen pal. Not for a few weeks. for three years.
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“I couldn’t figure things out,” Caroline explained. “He had nothing to show for the money, but he was always out for it.”
Communication began, she said, after her husband saw an ad online. While he initially claimed he was “trapped”, Kamel pushed back: “No, he wasn’t trapped. He was doing it deliberately of his own free will.”
Cruz confirmed the obvious question: Yes, it was the same inmate woman the whole time. The money, Caroline later learned, was used to fund commissary accounts or similar prison expenses.
“He just fell into it,” she said. “But he never told me—he kept it a secret.”
And for Caroline, emotional betrayal wasn’t the only wreck to deal with. Shortly after the truth was revealed, a tree fell on their house. “So we were dealing with a hole in our marriage and a hole in our home,” she said. If he wanted to leave, the practical issues of divorce and selling the house were off the table.
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When asked if they were actively working on their marriage, Caroline said she was attending therapy, while her husband—albeit reluctantly—agreed her to join the church and planned to attend a marriage retreat. But she admits she doesn’t feel like she has the whole story.
“He said it’s not going to be good. It’s too dark,” she said, referring to her husband’s response to her urging him to go to counseling.
“You can’t go on with half-truths,” Cruz told her. “There’s no way.”
Kamel asked her to pull her credit report and freeze her credit to prevent any new hidden accounts. He recommends setting up real-time transaction alerts, even if they separate accounts. Cruise supported the idea of Caroline tracking her “fun money” spending going forward.
“It’s not about her being a mother,” Cruz said. “It’s about rebuilding trust.”
Caroline admits she fears more secrets may come out. “I’m afraid something else is going to come,” she said. “He still hasn’t told me the whole truth.”
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Caroline’s story is far from unique. A Bankrate survey released last week found that 40% of American adults in a relationship have kept a financial secret, whether it’s a hidden expense, a loan, or an entire account. And 43% said those types of lies feel as bad or worse than cheating.
In Caroline’s case, the three years her husband spends quietly in a prison pen pal show how secret money habits can erode trust. Many couples don’t even know the full picture of each other’s finances, and that gap can turn into something much bigger.
Some red flags to watch for include:
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Always short of cash for no reason
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Being defensive when asked about money
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Fees do not add up
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Hiding passwords or bank access
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Avoid conversations about debt or budgeting
If you’re trying to rebuild trust — or protect yourself while figuring out the next steps — consulting with a financial advisor can help you set up railings, track spending, and plan for what comes next.
For Caroline, it’s not about the “fun money” anymore. It’s about protecting themselves and deciding whether they can still build something real — or if it’s time to walk away.
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This Article Woman Says Husband Was Always Broke — Then She Found 3 Years of ‘Fun Money’ Blowing in Jail Pen Pal After Pulling Phone Records ‘It’s Just So Dark’ originally appeared on Benzinga.com
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